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Welcome to the very first episode of Quiet Mind: Fearless and Free, a podcast dedicated to helping you quiet the mind, face your fears, and step into the freedom of a heart-centered life. I'm Leah Danley, licensed psychotherapist, and dietitian, founder of the quiet mind, a collective and holistic guide for those seeking peace beyond the busyness of life and the endless chatter of the mind, this podcast is a space for deep reflection, practical wisdom, and gentle encouragement. Together, we will explore how to live with greater calm and confidence as we fearlessly face the traumas of the past, in order to let go of the stories that hold us back, with the ultimate goal of reconnecting with the quiet intelligence within us all, each week, we will dive into a topic of curiosity, something to reflect On question and explore in our own lives without judgment and with compassion, from taming the inner critic to finding stillness in the middle of chaos and maybe even figuring out why your brain keeps replaying that embarrassing or terrifying moment from 20 years ago. There's something for everyone here.
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Welcome back to the Quiet Mind: Fearless, and Free podcast. I'm Leah Danley, and this is season one, From Fear to Freedom, Releasing Anxiety and Embracing Your True Self.
Today, I want to speak from the heart. I'm not sharing these concepts because I've mastered them perfectly. I'm sharing them because I've been there, caught in fear, playing small, and feeling trapped in the stories my mind was creating. I know how overwhelming it can feel when you're conditioned habit trail, your mind seems to be running the show. Also know the freedom that comes when you begin to see those patterns with compassion, question them, and gently release what no longer serves you.
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Last week, we explored the idea that you are not your thoughts. You're the sky behind the clouds, the quiet awareness behind the stories. Today we're going deeper into where those clouds come from, the core beliefs and patterns that have shaped how you experience yourself and the world. So let's dive in.
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So many of us move through life assuming our emotional reactions and fears are just part of us, of our personality. We take it for granted. But the truth is, most of those patterns are shaped by beliefs we formed long ago, often when we were too young to fully understand the world around us. These beliefs are informed by childhood environments and events, as well as generational trauma genetics, the Enneagram type we came in with, and much more. Today, we are focusing on the peace that comes from childhood events and environments. Imagine a hallway filled with open and closed doors. Behind each door is an experience, some we remember, and some we may only have a vague sense of, but each one helps shape how you see yourself and light.
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Some of these beliefs were formed in moments when you felt confused, hurt, or scared. But here's the important part, this isn't about blame. It's about feeling the pain and taking responsibility now to grow yourself because of that piece of your life's curriculum, this may include moments of anger towards another. Ultimately, I'm going to invite you to honor that, and when you are ready, move through that and reclaim the truth of who you always have been whole, complete, and lovable. No matter what happens to you or your body, no one gets to hold you back from your highest potential.
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We will talk in future episodes on how to work with trauma. It's real. It's not to be minimized. But back to how the mind works. It tends to hold on to the experiences where something didn't quite feel right, where you felt unseen, unheard, unsafe, or misunderstood, and out of these. Experiences, we develop coats or protectors that we wear. When I talk about the conditioned or the programmed mind, I'm talking about what we tell ourselves today because of all these self-beliefs and protector parts the mind holds on to moments that feel emotionally impactful, and those moments shape the patterns that negatively influence us today.
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For example, if you felt overlooked as a child, you may have absorbed the belief I don't matter if you felt judged or criticized, you might carry the belief I'm not good enough. If you felt abandoned, a belief like, I'm not safe, could have taken root. Definitely there was abuse. A belief like I'm not safe or I don't matter can apply.
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Here's the key, though, these beliefs are not objective truths. They are interpretations made by the younger version of you, often based on limited understanding at the time. They aren't interpretations you would make for your own child or someone you love, that experience the same event, yet for you and the young mind that locks these in, those beliefs may have felt true.
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Now remember, I'm here to remind you they are not who you are. Their stories, they happened, but they're not your identity. They don't have to be your identity. Dear friends, some of us may also have loving, wonderful memories and feel bad for thinking about hurtful experiences. There's some people listening that are going to say, well, it wasn't as bad as someone else's. I had a good childhood. I wasn't abused. I wasn't in a worse zone. My parents loved me and all that's valid, and I want to gently challenge the idea that pain has to be extreme to matter.
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You see, we often minimize our struggles because we compare them to others who may have endured more obvious hardships. I had food on the table. My parents worked hard. Other people had it so much worse. While that may all be true, it doesn't invalidate your experiences, whether they are big or small, big T or little T traumas, your experience is what you have to work with if you're struggling with fear, anxiety, or patterns of playing small. Now there's a reason for it, and you don't have to have gone through extreme trauma for your pain to be real.
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Our minds are incredibly sensitive to emotional patterns. Your soul's journey includes the lessons and challenges you were meant to face. Comparing pain only delays your healing.
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Healing begins when you stop minimizing your struggles, or, for some people, even over-emphasizing your struggles, and instead, no matter which way you're coming at it, you start to acknowledge them with compassion and be willing to grow and evolve because of them.
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Every challenge we face has the potential to guide us toward growth and healing.
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Remember, you are you. You're not created as anyone else, and you are invited to evolve yourself to your highest potential.
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This can't be done if you listen to comparison, one of our greatest gifts to those who suffer, whether it's us or others, is to be the best version of ourselves and let that vibration flow out of us in every encounter.
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Now let's return to that hallway metaphor for a moment.
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Picture yourself standing in a long hallway.
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Each door represents a bully or emotional experience you've stored over the years. So.
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Some doors are barely noticeable. Some are wide open with a happy memory and good feeling, while others feel shut tight but about to burst open at the slightest trigger.
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For example, when someone ignores your message or they criticize your work, it might push more intensity into the room labeled, I'm not good enough, or I don't matter. We try to keep that door closed because it doesn't feel good. However, when this belief gets activated, it can burst open and fall out into the hall, sometimes unexpectedly. It can feel overwhelming. Can feel like you're being flooded with emotions. Sometimes you don't even understand why.
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Here's what I want you to know, these triggers aren't proof of anything. They're not proof that you're broken, proof that you're failing all those stories that the mind wants to tell you.
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It's not that their invitations, their opportunities, their reminders that there's an old emotional wound, asking for your attention, begging for you to come and meet it.
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The way forward isn't to slam the door shut or ignore it, it is to gently open it, look inside at what you thought was the boogeyman in the closet, and instead meet that younger version of yourself with compassion and a gentle question, is this belief really true about you?
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Would it be true for anyone else in this circumstance?
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This is part of the process of healing, bringing awareness and curiosity without judgment to these old parts, sometimes hidden parts, gently questioning what is embedded there.
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So that the grip of these beliefs that make up the programmed, conditioned mind that is often present in today's life, It will help you have less and less control over yourself. It's not about needing to fix yourself. It's about authentically meeting yourself and re-establishing the truth of who you are.
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So find a place to sit quietly and close your eyes, and let's go through a gentle practice to explore some of your core beliefs with compassion.
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Take a few slow, deep breaths
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in through the nose,
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out through the mouth,
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a gentle stalk of your body, noticing it from head to toe, making sure that you are fully present and now recall a recent moment where you felt anxious, triggered or emotionally reactive in some way, ask yourself, What did this experience invite me to fee?
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Now ask yourself, is there a belief behind this feeling?
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So for instance, the experience might invite someone to feel shame or disgust or anger, and if you look under that, what is that deeper belief about me that happened in that event that fuel that response and the belief might be fear, I'm not saying that I'm not safe. Was the belief? Or it could be with anger, a belief that I don't matter, and then I respond in anger. So just question that look at what the emotion was that arose, maybe even notice where you felt it in your body.
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Then notice what were you believing about yourself in that moment.
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Now, notice is a familiar state for you.
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Have you ever felt this way before?
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Most of the time, the answer is yes, because it is a pattern that the conditioned mind produces, and this is a beautiful opportunity to take this event and look and see where does this come from?
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Where did I first begin to feel this belief about myself?
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This belief is formed from an old experience.
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Where did that originate?
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Now, no matter what is coming up for you, just continue to breathe and know that you are safe. You are okay, right here, right now, in this present moment, we're not needing to go back and reenact a bunch of trauma right now. This is just a gentle exploration of Where did these beliefs come from that don't help me today, and then to remember it's not my truth.
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It doesn't have to be my truth. Today, I can meet this part of myself with compassion, and I can gently question it, and when the time is right, I can begin to let it go.
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The goal isn't to ignore any feeling that we have. We want to bring it up and feel it fully, bring it out of the darkness and into the light, and in that light, you can question the truth of this belief and see if it's something you want to keep. Is it serving? Is it helping?
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You didn't have a choice when you were little, but now, as your adult has access to greater wisdom, you began to have more and more choice.
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The more you become aware of these patterns that the programmed mind keeps you lost in, the less power they'll have over you.
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Thank you for sharing this space with me today. I hope this has been helpful. Exploring core beliefs can feel tender, but it can also be deeply empowering when you start to see these patterns for what they are, old stories, old beliefs that got locked in from a young mind that didn't know how to handle it or interpret it in any other way, you open the door to incredible freedom.
Next week, we'll explore protective patterns, the ways we develop coping mechanisms to shield ourselves from pain, and how those patterns can become heavy, like coats we've outgrown. Remember you are enough.
You are already home.
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If this reflection resonates with you, I invite you to follow me on Instagram at quiet mind collective with Leah in my bio, there.
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You'll find a link to my free 15 minute meditation. It's a simple guide to help you step back from the roller coaster of the mind and reconnect with your heart centered wisdom. Thank you for joining me on this journey. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, share it with someone who might need this message or leave a review to help others find this podcast. Stay tuned for upcoming episodes where we'll explore how to work with the past, navigate the conditioned mind and untangle its sticky web one step at a time. And hey, let's make this a two way conversation. Drop me a message and let me know what resonated with you. I'm here for the stories and the connection too.
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Until next time, stay curious, stay present and remember you already have everything you need to be fearless and free. You and.
